example_id int64 1 400 | post stringlengths 31 2.53k | comment_1 stringlengths 3 2.7k | comment_2 stringlengths 9 2.37k | comment_1_label stringclasses 6
values | comment_2_label stringclasses 6
values | more_helpful_comment stringclasses 2
values | batch stringclasses 3
values |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
161 | Before suggesting breaking up, hear me out. I’ve been in this relationship for a couple of years and it is truly making me lose myself. I care too much, admittedly sometimes about very small and stupid things. We will fight about these small things constantly. I also care too much about seeing him whenever I can becaus... | Do you have girlfriends? Set times to hang out with them and try to stay off your phone / create space between you and your BF. Another way to do that is by doing your hobbies. Remind yourself you need independence. It makes you a better, more interesting partner. And, if things go south, it leaves you with a community... | Stop arguing over small things. if you are arguing & are long distance this is a problem. You can care for someone, doesn’t mean you have to be in a relationship. Start doing your things, you are the one choosing to not do them. | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
171 | I am sorry ahead for some mistakes, English is not my first language.
I (21F) have been dating my boyfriend (21M) for 3 years. Over the past year, he has made 2 new female friends at his school. They would hang out after class and go for a lunch together (sometimes also with my BF's male friend as a group) and all fou... | I get where both of you are coming from, him drawing a boundary with school connections is reasonable.
I think a fair compromise is that next time the group has drinks, you can drop in for a drink at some point, that allows him to introduce you in a casual way and leave together. That isn't overly intrusive, but it do... | >Last week one of the girls wrote him and they spent half a day hanging out together
So they went on a date?
>They would hang out after class and go for a lunch together (sometimes **also with my BF's male friend** as a group) and all four of them would also go out for drinks.
>He doesn't know how to introduce me ... | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
172 | My fiance and I have been together for four years. When we first got together we had sex & did sexual activities all the time. We couldn’t keep our hands off of each other. Last October we got busy renovating our new home and working all the time that we weren’t as active. We moved in together in March of this year and... | 6 months ago you posted about spicing up your sex life, did you ever do that? If so, do you think maybe you went too far and it's turned him off? | Get a new fiance. | Commentator's opinion | Sarcasm | Comment 1 | part 3 |
176 | This is going to be a silly post but yesterday I got my first haircut in ~15 years. I’m a 27 year old guy and I’ve always been known for having really long hair and my hairstyle was honestly perfect for me— but I wanted to try something new out and so I took the risk and cut my hair.
… big mistake and I went from hot... | As someone who’s been both average (or worse) and well above average, I promise you it’s much easier when you’re attractive. Having a lot of people interested in you and then having to weed through to get the right ones is a much better situation than having hardly anyone interested at all. | Dating is three things. Physical attraction, shared goals, and actually getting along with each other.
Yes, there's such a thing as being pursued by people who don't actually like you because they think you're very physically attractive and don't care about anything else and it can be a practical problem. | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
178 | Am I bad person? I 24M have fancied this girl, 23 F, for a very long time. She has been with her boyfriend 29M for 5 years. We have a massive friendship group and I have never had a convo longer than 5 minutes and would never meet up together. she has been unhappy for the past 2 years and he doesn’t treat her right. He... | NAS Syndrome you bought her pitty story…soon she will say the same about you to another dude she’ll cheat on you with | Congratulations OP you are a scumbag.
But don't worry there are plenty of us out here and if you put in some effort you can become a reformed former scumbag.
Don't stick your dick in taken women. It's easy. | Commentator's opinion | Hurtful | Comment 2 | part 3 |
183 | TLDR: I slept with the sister of my close friend's wife before I've met my girlfriend and she can't accept it. It looks like we are gonna break up due to this problem. Do you know what would help in this situation?
As you might have guessed from the title, I slept with the sister of a close friend's wife. This clo... | Jesus dude did u have to drag the girl here for no reason? None of that was necessary to the story yet u still felt the need to attack? The fuck. | Ok how did she rind this out? Usually talking about past relationships and/or sexual partners is a no no in current relationships. Besides I don't see what the big deal is as most people will have a sexual past. That seems odd. | Hurtful | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
184 | I wanted to know if anyone on this sub has had experiences dating with HSV2 and how was it?
If not would you consider dating someone with HSV2?
If your not educated on the topic here’s a pdf:
https://www.herpes.org.nz/application/files/2116/7988/2733/STIEF_leaflet_-_Herpes_Myth_vs_Facts_2023_-_single_page.pdf
| Nope i would never. | There is a OLD site called positive singles for people with Herpes and even HIV to date other positive people if you are concerned about any stigma or spreading the condition. | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
186 | i have absolutely no idea how to talk to ppl, let alone a girl i like. what do i say to her after she added me back cuz i cant think of anything to talk about | Wait for her to post a story and then slide up saying something about it. Or just be a man and message her. | Either be genuine or don't even attempt to talk | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
187 | i absolutely adore and love this guy so much, we’re not officially in a relationship yet but we both say i love you and are loving with one another.
however i find myself having severe anxiety around him, i have social anxiety disorder, so maybe that’s it. but i hear a lot of people say that your body will tell you wh... | It sounds like you just plain have anxiety/ocd issues and no relationship is going to fix that. If anything a relationship will make you MORE nervous lol. | There's a lot of nuance to this, from what you're saying it doesn't seem like *he* is the cause of your anxiety and consequent problems (insomnia, diarrhea etc.), do you feel anxious when you're around him? | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
190 | I'm a friggin clean slate. I know NOTHING. I barely even have friends that aren't dudes. I need help getting started. I grew up in an household where emphasis was 1000% on school. safe to say, i "wasted" my time in uni in this regard where most date around and figure out what they want/need. I'm not a devoid of human c... | Downside is that the dating market is pretty brutal right now. Many women are dating/screwing like Harvey Weinstein these days. We shot past the goal of equality and went straight into reverse toxic masculinity. If you're just getting started, the first thing to figure out is what your goal in having relationships is g... | Try a matchmaker | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
193 | i (25f) have been dating a guy (25m) for 7 months consistently. 2 nights ago (saturday) we had plans to see each other but he got off work later than anticipated so we decided to wait until the following day. he told me he’d call me before bed. he never called me and i called him a few times and he never replied which ... | Beautiful girl. I have been in this place. As hard as it is, when you have your strength back, it might take you days/weeks but I hope you leave this man. If he can do this now, it won't get better, although he will say it will. If he loved you enough we wouldn't risk losing you to get something out of his system. In f... | I won’t wish being cheated on, on my worst enemy. Its absolute bs that he wanted to get it out of his system. The relationship is new. Sex between you two should be the most desirable.
He knows your history of being cheated on. Unfortunately, you met a douche that took what you shared with him as a blue print. Some g... | Emotional Support | Emotional Support | Comment 1 | part 3 |
194 | I'm (26M) very new to dating. I never dated or have ever been in a relationship just due to me being very introverted and extremely shy growing up, but I've recently starting growing out of that shell more and I've made a few dating app profiles to get started. I'm just wondering if it's something I should be straight ... | You don't openly tell anyone. If they ask then maybe you can tell them. Women may judge and will consider it a red flag and a turn off more so then if the roles were flipped. Just have to find someone whose understanding, doesn't care, and/or in the same boat | No, you shouldn't do that.
It would be comparable to you approaching a woman, and immediately (right when you first ever talk to her) apologize e.g. for being shy, or for not being eloquent, or for being quite nervous, or for daring to be in her presence.
All of that comes out of a bad mindset, that apologetic, fear-... | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
195 | So my partner isn't happy the fact that I would lie about eating unhealthy or when I am at a low I drink and then not tell her the truth when she asks. She said if I can lie about this then I can lie about everything else. Tho I said there a morals and bottom lines about these as I am not an alcoholic or anything, I hi... | She’s right.
Why are you lying at all?
If you plan to be unhealthy then own it. Let her decide if she wants that. Be honest with yourself.
Your word either means something or it does not. | I mean yea it's not crazy to think that if ur going to lie about little things ull have no issue lying about big things. Also healthy ppl don't hide drinking or eating | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
196 | I (F, 28) and Husband (M,25) have been together 4 years and don't know what the problem is. I just get completely disgusted when we kiss, touch, have sex. This has been going on for about 2 years. We have been together for 4. When we first got together, it was like rabbits. For the last 2 years, I don't like the feel... | First, find a new doctor. Then find out if you have a hormonal imbalance. This happened to me, and we worked through it with medication and therapy. I am still not interested in sex a lot, but once we start with the foreplay, I can warm to it, and we are intimate weekly. | What doctor suggests porn as a solution lol
Don't listen to that doctor because this doesn't seem to be a constructive advice and I don't think it has any medical backing either. You probably don't like sex because of a hormonal imbalance. Get your estrogen and progesterone levels checked. | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
200 | Recently, I met a girl who will hang out talk to each other go places together, hold hands with kiss and we hang on during the night because apparently she's busy with her friends most of the time I ask her out to hang out every time I try to ask her to hang out. She says that she has plans with her friends, so does th... | How long have you been dating with this girl? I do think it’s kind of a red flag that she hasn’t just included you in her plans with her friends.
When my boyfriend and I started dating, I wanted to see him as much as possible. sometimes I had plans with my friends and instead of standing him up, I asked my friends if ... | You should communicate with her then! It’s not cool at all that she’s doing this to you time and time again. If she’s truly interested in you then she would make the time when it’s convenient for both of you. | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
203 | You can scroll through my previous post about the history of my father but a quick rundown. Since I was young he used to show me this woman and do a shh motion to indicate I shouldn’t tell my mom. They ended up getting a divorce and towards the end of my parents marriage he wasn’t even trying to hide it anymore. She wa... | Here's what you do- double down on being an adult. Study, earn money, be sure your sister has what she needs as best you can, and live your best life.
Set some healthy boundaries so you can thrive. You know exactly who your dad is. Move on and heal. | Unfortunately, you can’t control other people. There’s no way to make him see things from your perspective. I know that sucks. I had a freakishly similar experience to yours. Over the years reading many many self help books and several therapists later, I’ve come to understand that I just have to accept it. Easier said... | Practical Advice | Emotional Support | Comment 1 | part 3 |
204 | My girlfriend and I are in a huge fight right now.
We've been together for two years and love each other but keep fighting over little things. She was mostly saying I should change how I did some stuff. I'll be honest: I really should work on many things and have been trying to. It's just that I seem to always fall bac... | She is not your mother. She should not have to communicate every goddamn time you do something if you tell her you'll stop doing it. Stop doing it. Don't rely on her to keep reminding you. She's tired of it, of course she's pissed. | Honestly it sounds like ur the issue. She wouldn't have to communicate so much if just stopped doing the things again | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
207 | Dating for 1.5 years and intimacy has been very minimal because “antidepressants took his sex drive”. We were semi open because we always agreed sending nudes was not an issue. As for physical encounters we could talk about it.
He knows I am not asexual but that I am waiting for him and his times with his own self jour... | That guy has you but won’t have sex but has no problem buying sex? You should be grateful you haven’t been fucking this dude. I am sorry he has been leading you on for nothing, idk what this guys endgame is with this relationship with you if he doesn’t want to be serious, you should just dump him when you guys get back... | please speak up, there’s no excuse for cheating | Emotional Support | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
209 | I’m starting to search for a more longterm thing, would i be fooling myself if I get intimate early on like I have when looking for casual fwb type relationships? Like first through 3rd date is that going to either only attract people looking for casual stuff or like put me in a box where I won’t be seen as a good cand... | No it doesn’t but you should hold off on it if you’re genuinely looking for a serious relationship
This way you can sift through incompatible partners BEFORE getting feelings involved | Hasn't been true for me at all. I hooked up with my partner as soon as we saw each other again after some years. We started our relationship then and there. When it clicks well it's almost natural. | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
211 | Me (male 21) and my partner (female 21) has been together for one and a half years. It is my first relationship and we spend all our time together since we are both in the same uni. The two of us would spend so much time together that both of our social circles diminished. One the extreme end, for me in particular, I h... | This sounds incredibly co dependent. This sounds like u need therapy. | I think the new relationship energy, especially since it’s your first one, is skewing things for you away from healthy and into really codependent.
It’s healthy to have your own friends, hobbies, and interests in addition to those you share with your partner. Abandoning all other relationships and making your partner ... | Hurtful | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
218 | I will go first; leave if the energy is not being reciprocated and don't make others convince you that your boundaries are negotiable | If something feels wrong at first then leave asap. Trust your intuition. | It took me forever to realize this:
Don’t place someone at a higher value than yourself.
When you start seeing someone new, and feel a connection that you haven’t felt for a while, it’s so easy to fall hard and fast for them. BUT, when/if they start to pull away - let them pull away.
Don’t play hard to get, but j... | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
222 | hello friends,
when i was a junior in college i befriended this freshman. we were very platonic, just got lunch and chatted semi frequently. now, i have graduated and im 22. this summer we are hanging out a bunch, and we went to an 18+ emo club / party and ended up holding hands and being very intimate. i confessed to... | 20 and 22 is no problem at all. A typical age range to be in when in a relationship. You just need to make your different lifestyles work when you'll be having a regular job and she is still studying. But that shouldn't be a big issue, people make it work all the time. It's a super common scenario. Good luck, OP. There... | I swear we're fast getting to the point where we're going to see "is 3 months too much of an age gap" on here. | Emotional Support | Hurtful | Comment 1 | part 3 |
224 |
I’ve been in a relationship for about 4 years now with an amazing girl! Truly is my best friend. The most loyal and caring human being towards me! Only thing is I don’t have that spark for her and I never really did. I know she is head over heels for me and honestly that’s why I have been with her for so long. We now ... | You're treading dangerous waters, bud. Everyone is nice when they're single and looking. I'd really hate to see you unbuild your life with someone you were going to marry, pursue this other woman and find out she's actually not compatible once your new relationship rolls along. | As an older man who has gone through the shit storm many a times in my life.....
Trust me.... It's not worth it.
Not trying to be the moral police here. But, life is long and 20 years down the line you still realize that it's a blessing to have someone who loves you more than you love your self. If you got family tha... | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
225 | I was at a wedding this weekend, and while there were some things that went well ( got to dance with a girl and got her number at the end of the night) I did some very awkward things looking back on it and probably ruined my chances. Every time I have some sort of social interaction that isn’t normal or expected, I loo... | I think experiencing this is just a part of growing up. I know i went through something similar.
You just have to take that experience and deny some impulses that pop up. | "A-a-Ron", nice deep cut reference of a classic Key & Peele sketch.
Anyway, as a somewhat socially awkward man (I don't feel that way, but have been perceived that way), you just need to learn how to find your people.
You'll eventually learn how to spot the people who "get it", versus the ones that don't. | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
230 | I 28F have been seeing this guy 35M for about two and half months. We had great chemistry from date one, and have maintained consistent communication and time together though we both have jobs that require travel and long hours some days - we’ve made it work nonetheless. We’ve done no sleepovers or anything significant... | Nobody can set your boundaries, but you. I would at least have the conversation with him that you are seeing his indecision as stagnation, and that for you, it is a deal breaker.
If you feel differently than this, then explain it. Wouldn't spending almost 3 months warrant an honest conversation about limitations? | You guys should be having these convos in person, or at least by phone… not by text. | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
231 | So we became a thing when I was 16 and she was 30. I believe I was groomed but at the time I didn’t realize it that I was being used. People warned me but I didn’t want to believe it.
A few years later I realized how fucked up my life is.
I graduated high school early for her, lost friends and didn’t keep in touch w... | I think you were groomed. | You can’t really move on,all you can do is forgive yourself for it and try to be a better person than you were yesterday, groomers will never realize how much they took from you, you can go to the police for statutory rape depending on state you live in. They always move on with their life’s as if we are nothing, leave... | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
236 |
My boyfriend cheated on me, and after that, our relationship was never the same. I discovered that he was seeing another girl and talking to three more on Tinder. He had been using Tinder for three months while he was with me. I decided to forgive him. After he cheated on me, he constantly accused me of being unfaithf... | The relationship is done. He was unhappy that you didn’t trust him (for good reason) and that you weren’t ‘letting him’ do what he wanted with whoever he wanted.
The dude was (is) a disrespectful, dishonest, disloyal cheating asshole. People like that aren’t good people with high moral character. When someone shows... | It's bananas. He sounds like the worst. He cheats on you, sucks up your money, and you want to go back to him? I don't understand. Am I missing something? It's got to be a joke post. | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
237 | Sometimes it’s a hit or miss with a match on OLD when the guy stop responding or unmatched me. I honestly just laugh it off but i really like to know what makes you turned off?
| “Wyd” - sends me into a rage 🤣🤣🤣🤣 | A few things for me (26m)
1. Trying to get me to sub to something (onlyfans, fansly, etc.) It shows you already assume that I'm only sex minded, and that's not an energy I can start or continue a convo on
2. One word responses that don't give me room to move the conversation. If I ask you a question, give me more than,... | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
238 | I (18F) have little experience in dating. This guy (18M) has been liking every single story I post. I’m interested. We went to the same middle school and I’m looking to rekindle things.
I have been liking his stories and just now I liked a note that he posted, but when I did, I genuinely felt nauseated and disgusted a... | You'd be amazed at what you can find with open and honest communication. | Just message the dude. Why dance around it like this? | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
239 | For a brief background, we've been dating/going out together for 4 months. He asked me what I wanted for our relationship, so I said I needed to know if we were on the same page before making any decisions. This morning, he admitted he likes me, and I told him I like him too. But then he said, "We're clear now? Then I'... | 4 months seems like a very very long time not to even say that you like each other. That usually comes up within a few dates for me | the fact you call him saying he likes you already a confession says you're expecting too much. life isn't an anime. were you hoping for fireworks to go off randomly in the background and for him to pin you against the wall and start making out with you?
he seems distant now because you confronted him on it and told him... | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
240 |
I am in a long-distance relationship. We are very much in love with each other. She has a very high sex drive so we sext often, which I love to do. We have a great relationship outside one thing: she has a pretty massive kink for NTR or “cuckolding”.
She brought it up several times and wants to involve me in it. Basi... | There’s a close to zero chance it will only be once, lol. If you research cuckolding, it’s usually the man who has that kink, not the woman (seeing his partner with someone else, humiliation, etc). I think she’s just horny & wants your permission to fuck.
If you’re uncomfortable, say no. Maybe suggest an open relation... | OP, this is just a way for her to have sex with other guys, and have you on board with it. You should refuse to participate, and tell her it makes you highly uncomfortable. Tell her if it comes up again, the relationship is over.
Tell her you would like to have sex with other women, and have her watch. Ask her if she ... | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
242 | I’ll preface by saying I understand everyone is looking for something different. I’m also not saying I don’t know what I’m looking for. I just don’t know how to phrase it in a way that is clear.
-I’m definitely not looking for a hookup.
-I’m not necessarily dating to marry, as in, I’m not in any hurry. I feel like a... | You can say something like, "I'm open to meeting new people and seeing where things go naturally. I'm looking for genuine connections and enjoying the dating process, with the possibility of something serious if it feels right." This communicates your openness to both casual dating and potentially something more seriou... | Pressure for who? | Practical Advice | Not Relevant | Comment 1 | part 3 |
243 | I don’t even know where to begin with this but I’ll try to be as short as possible with giving the full story.
I’m 26 and my girlfriend is 24. We’ve been together for a little over two years. Living together for a year.
We have a very active sex life, usually every day or every other day. She was my first. I wasn’t... | Porn in relationships is kind of a tricky topic. The sort of stuff your partner watches can bring up insecurities in you that you had no idea existed, or even actually give you new ones, it's pretty crazy.
When it comes to the OF thing, it's kind of obvious that it's not gonna be a good idea to look up OF girls even i... | OK, the OF thing - nice try, slick, but this is a relationship not a debating society, technicalities don’t win they just make you look sneaky
On the rest: I get not being cool with you being into specific porn people, that becomes a very direct comparison between that person and her, which is not a nice feeling. Mor... | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
246 | I think the main reason I am writing this is in the off chance he will he will see which is absolutely pathetic but hey guess I’m pathetic right now.
When I say husband, it’s only bc we can’t get divorced yet. If I refinance then it will double my mortgage and I can’t pay that but I kicked him out years ago we soon as... | What's relapsing on MS? | Cognitive dissonance is the answer. He knows cheating on you while you were sick is a scummy low-down thing to do. He is an awful person UNLESS you were a witch and a terrible wife before you got sick. He has probably rewritten history in his own mind and convinced his AP that they aren't really bad people because the ... | Not Relevant | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
247 | I've been dating a guy for 6 months. His birthday was last month and I spent almost $200 on gifts that would be personal to him. My birthday was last week. He wished me a happy birthday via text and that was it. He told me he got me a "small gift" but never gave it to me after seeing him 3 times since.
I got really em... | Sounds like one of you was in the relationship the entire time while the other wasn't. | Never spend that much money for the first gift unless you have no expectations the value would be matched. Not worth it for someone you known for 5 months dating wise. It’s okay to have expectations but given his lack of response or care I’d drop him | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
251 | I’ve been texting with this guy for about a month and a half, we hung out once after a couple weeks of talking and I had a great time and he said that he did too. After that I went out of town for a little over a week and we agreed to hang out again after I got back. However, for the last week or so he’s been taking lo... | Respectfully I think he is giving you every sign to move on. Even if he is being genuine, would you want this to be the typical cadence? You deserve someone who wants you and is on the same page. If nothing else stop talking to him first and see how he reacts. | If he's juggling a lot, it could explain the slow replies, but actions speak louder than words. Maybe send a casual message like, "Hey, hope you're doing okay! Still up for hanging out soon?" If he doesn't respond or make plans, it might be time to move on. No need to wait around indefinitely. | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
252 | Hello everyone. Hope you're all doing well. Just came seeking some advice.
My girlfriend and I have been together for a little over two months, however, we've known each other for longer (we've spoken for over a year).
When we got together, I experienced a lot of anxiety, which I suspect to be ROCD (a form of OCD fo... | I’ve never heard of ROCD, but if you think you have it, get yourself a real diagnosis & treatment instead of just suspecting you have it & letting it drive your thoughts.
The lead-up to what she said looks like dirty talk focused on fantasy. You started it by asking if she could see you with another girl. She then to... | Everyone has different way of expressing their sexuality, she was honest about a fantasy. It's important to accept that people will have fantasies and such, we can't control what others want. She also seems like she's cares about you with how she cried afterwards. Even with that fantasy, she can still love you as you ... | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
254 | As the title suggests, I'm having trouble navigating these types of conversations about moving in with two female roommates: one is a loose friend of a friend, and the other is a personal friend. (I can't afford to live alone and to me, these two people seemed like the best fit for me.) For most of my life, I've had no... | You said these women felt like the best fit for you. That’s telling. If it was me in your position, the best fit for me would be people that were the same sex because I know that would be best for my relationship and my relationship would be very important to me. Long distance is already SO hard, I would personally lea... | Well, if she's long-distance, this isn't going to be easy, but I've always found the best way to make your partner feel comfortable with your opposite-sex friends is to introduce them. Let them all get to know each other and possibly develop a friendship of their own, so they'll see they're no threat to them or your re... | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
255 | So I got out of a relationship last year and I’m having a hard time moving on. What’s something that’s helped you move on from you ex or any advice you can give to move forward and start dating again? I feel Iike I’ve lost my soulmate and I’m having a hard time moving on. | I just made a post looking for this exact advice. OP, please let me know if you find anything that helps. I feel for you. | You need to fall in love with yourself again. Simple. I once went through a heartbreak that hurt me and I never told I'd get over the person.
It was taking too long and I could not even reciprocate to people who liked me. I got rid of all the things that reminded me of my ex-pictures, clothes, and I started working o... | Not Relevant | Emotional Support | Comment 2 | part 3 |
257 | my friend just called me asking if i'd be upset if her and my dad got together. he's literally in his fourties and she's 18. they've apparently been talking back and forth and flirting for a while which is weird mostly because of his history.
He's VERY strict with me, who i date, my outfits i wear in public, and my pa... | Are u serious? Tell them ull cut them both off that's fucking gross. This is grooming for sure ur dad's a predator | > I was only adopted by him a year ago and didn't know him too well prior
So this man was just a legal guardian to you for the past year?
Yeah, he isn't your dad. He's an abuser who is absolutely planning to abuse your friend as well. If you haven't, I would tell her that he's been physically abusive with you and tha... | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
259 | So we’ve had arguments about this one girl in the past who he said was just a friend to him, and I never believed it because their exchanges seemed flirty. He had been liking her photos and what not and I actually just requested that he doesn’t keep contact with her if he’s had a flirtatious relationship in the past. H... | Don’t get gaslit. It said what it said. Someone entered that word by that number. If not him, then who? | Your're married so presumably you share a phone plan. Log in to your online billing and look at activity under his number. it will show you what numbers he's texting, calling etc. You are not the problem here. | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
261 | hi there, i recently reached back out to an ex that i cut off contact with two years ago. he did something that really upset me, and i decided to set the boundary and block him and i hadn’t spoken to him until last month in two years. it’s hard considering him an ex because we were pretty young and the bulk of our rela... | You say it isn't high stakes but I do think you have to be realistic about how intense your feelings may become given how quickly they came back and the reality it would be long distance. That can be a lot more tiring than you hope.
To me the stakes rather than being low instead feel weighted towards a negative outco... | If you have no intention of dating seriously, do you really want to offer your heart to him? | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
265 | I've been on and off with guy for two years. We both know we still have feelings for each other but there's just a lot of baggage that makes us not be together. But recently we had like an actual cut off where we didn't talk to each other for a month. I may have told him that we should both see other people and see how... | Stop playing with his head! Leave him cut every connection | You don't deserve him | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
279 | I [38] have a female friend [36] who I've been developing feelings for the last few months. I seriously thought she was too, especially a few weeks ago when we were hanging out and she started being very physical affectionate in a way she hasn't ever been before - she sneaked up and kissed me on the cheek when we met, ... | It is odd how she made it seem like it was something more than a platonic friendship. I myself am a very touchy person with my friends (who are comfortable with it and know me pretty well). I can relate to holding hands but I have never kissed my friends on the cheek nor have cuddled?? It's like she intentionally wante... | Hmm maybe she's an emotionally avoidant person, who's afraid of showing and responding to affection. She do like u and the day u went to hang out in the park her harmonies conquered her fear but when she got ur messages and didn't know how to react so she chose the worst way---rej and pretend to be cool. IDK this is a ... | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
280 | Hey everyone! I just recently joined dating apps and have talked to three guys seriously so far. The first two were nice and we went on dates and it was good but with the third guy we’ve only texted so far but it feels different somehow, like this is how it’s supposed to feel. We haven’t even been in our date yet (whic... | Have a good time on your date. Sounds like you're excited, just remember to not let anything you don't want to happen too soon. | People can be very different in person.
Just approach your date with an open mind. If it feels more awkward than over the phone, that might not necessarily be a sign that you’re not well suited for each other. | Emotional Support | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
281 | I’ve never been on a drink date so I’m curious what the etiquette is. Im talking something light not a full course.
Reason being, I don’t see myself going out for water or juice/mocktails and I don’t drink alcohol or coffee…plus the drinks are the most expensive things on the menu. | Pay for yourself and you can do what you want. I like tapas on a date. | Why go on a drinks date if you’re not drinking? I would counter with another date idea, it makes zero sense to specifically go out for drinks when you don’t drink alcohol or coffee when you could just literally do anything else. | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
282 | I’m (F19) dating (M24) he has this thing which I find very strange this is my first ever serious relationship he tends to be very rough in a playful way but when I do the same thing he tells me I’m aggressive if we’re watching a movie he goes on his phone is completely fine but if I do it an argument happens he opens t... | You aren't going to like this answer.
You are a teenager dating an adult. There is a reason he isn't able to date people his own age.
When you are 24 you aren't likely to put up with the kind of shit he is putting you through. (see first point). It's best to learn the lesson now and not over commit.
Everyt... | The age gap is too big at this stage in life. You are barely an adult (technically still a teenager) and he sounds like a toxic manipulator taking advantage of that. It might be hard now but try to leave for your own good. You deserve better | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
284 | Me (23F) and my ex (32M) met on dating app. I've just got out of a 3-year relationship 3 months ago. Although I hate to admit, my initial intentions to download the dating app was to have some fun. Then I matched with this guy, which is my ex. He said that he wanted to date to marry. He seemed super sincere, after matc... | I’m an atheist, I believe in sex after marriage.
It’s not exactly his fault. Guys have less respect for you after you have sex. It happens all the time.
It sounds like you didn’t even talk to him or try to save the relationship before dumping him. I think this is, to say the least, irresponsible. How are you going to... | Even though you both agreed, the toxic mindset that men have is that if she did it with that quick then she did it with everybody. Basically you’re easy.
This is why I believe if you’re ever going to have sex with a guy thats not your partner, you have to be okay with the possibility of him ghosting you the next day. ... | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
287 | I'm a very sweet and affecionate person. Constantly get told as much by women I match with. But the thing is when I'm affecionate or sweet it doesn't work out. Just wondering why that is and if I should stop it. | I personally love when a man is affectionate. But physical touch is one of my love languages | I love it, if they're affectionate but not suffocating | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
291 | Hello everyone,
It seems like my relationship is going downhill. My girlfriend is almost never happy with me and gets mad at everything I do. For example, we went to a festival last night (even though I hate festivals and she knows that but I went for her because I knew it would make her happy) and this morning she wa... | I'm sure you do care about her as a person, but you basically made a list of reasons why you should break up. Do you still love her and actually feel it in you to fight for the relationship or is it really just for the fear of starting anew? | Yes, if the two of you are not happy, you should break up. People often stay in an unhappy relationship because it’s become comfortable or they fear being alone . You both deserve to be with someone who makes you happy. Say, “It doesn’t seem as if we make each other happy and , I don’t see this relationship going any ... | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
294 | I (28 F) matched with a guy (31 M) on a dating app, and conversation has gone well. It's the most I've engaged with someone for a while. He asked for my phone number and I said no. He said he understood. I explained without too much detail that I got out of an abusive relationship a few years ago and had some stalking ... | I mean he apologized so there’s clearly a conscious there.
Seems like he was trying to make a joke to make you feel better about it or be flirty or something and he didn’t realize how you would respond. You aren’t wrong to be uncomfortable but I wouldn’t necessarily end it all because of one bad joke. It’s a dating a... | If it made you uncomfortable and you want to end the conversation, that's valid. Your boundaries are your boundaries.
If you're not sure, you could always take a few days off the app to think it over and decide if his apology feels genuine. If you decide to continue getting to know him, now that he knows it is a bound... | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
298 | I (F21) hAve been seeing this guy (M32) for 7ish months at this point. We were talking about going away and I asked "oo where should we go" and he goes "the bush so that I can r*** you". I immediately had a pretty visceral reaction: "what the fuck" "fuck you" "where did that come from" "what compells you to say sometbi... | Run | Normal people don't make jokes about raping their partner. | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
303 | So I started dating this guy from a different state and all was good, he'd text me like crazy and say how much he likes me and l like him too so three days ago we made things official but these past two days he's just been busy and doesn't even like my messages or send me a quick text
Instead he'd leave me on deliver... | Idk how anyone can do long distance. I don't trust anyone anymore lol. Too busy to respond but online? He is lying about something. My ex used to do that when he traveled for work. I knew immediately something was off. | He just wants sex. This is a very common behavior for fboys. | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
306 | I’ve (29m) have been talking with this girl (33f) and been on a few dates and she said she needs space to grieve and be in silence and with family. She’s a therapist and it’s been tough because she was just out of the country for 2 weeks and after 2 dates is leaving again now to attend that funeral and will be gone 10 ... | Sounds like a very direct and straightforward way to tell you she’s fucking busy for a week because she’s had a death in the family and she doesn’t have the time or energy to be on “had a few dates with” terms with a new person.
Are you really going to take this as some kind of attempt to avoid you? How self-centered ... | Or maybe she's just grieving and going through a tough time | Hurtful | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
307 | Hi everyone,
Quick context:
We have been dating for a couple months now. This is my first real relationship, and have only been on a few dates with a girl before that. My girlfriend has had several relationships but none that lasted very long (a few months at most). My gf is also very comfortable with her guy friends ... | Male freinds are a red flag
Hanging out and getting drunk with?
Drunk in his bed ????
Theres no way that she’d be able to convince me they didnt have sex.
Who sleeps in other mens beds while in a relationship. Ppl masturbate and have sex on those mattresses. Im not comfortable with at all.
U might have to break up... | I was a wild child in my uni days. Was partying, was going to bars and slept in friends houses a lot. I have slept in beds with people I barely knew to sleep. BUT I never did that when I was in relationship, either found a way to go to my dorm/house or shared a bed with a female friend.
Her responses seems gaslight-is... | Commentator's opinion | Emotional Support | Comment 1 | part 3 |
308 | My ex and I decided before our kid was born that we weren’t going to allow any pictures of her online. This came from our own wants of privacy as well as the protection of her from creeps online. Even while attending daycare we wouldn’t allow her to be included in anything public.
We expressed this desire to all clos... | Dont give her any photographs and dont let her take them either | Report the pictures and her account over and over again on top of not giving her pictures and telling her she can't take pictures anymore, - now keep in mind she can always take them behind your back and still post them - I know crazy gmas that have done that there is nothing you can do really besides that nobody has t... | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
312 | my bf of 4 years cheated on me with my bestfriend for months. Would y’all stay too? We don’t have kids or aren’t married (thank god lol). Recently moved to San Diego, CA and prices are no joke here. That’s the biggest thing i’m considering before deciding to leave. He always talked about marriages and babies so this wa... | Not all men cheat. But yours does so you should move on. | That’s many lies over an extended period of time. He doesn’t respect you as his partner or as a person. Be done. He’s shown you who he is, believe him. Look a little further north or east, if you can commute. It is more affordable. | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
315 | My gf wants one but I have no idea how to do it I tried three times on her wrist but it still doesn't work, I bite a small area with my lips and suck it but still nothing shows up. Any ideas? | technique is the key here! how hard are you sucking? are you biting hard enough? usually it’s a few nibbles and then some sucking (you should suck harder than you think you should; make sure the skin is being pulled up slightly into your lips so the capillaries in the vessels can break slightly) and then a hickey can s... | Hickeys are made with intense sucking, not biting. Depending on your lip shape and mouth size, it might be tricky, especially if you are doing it on a thicker piece of skin. There’s a reason people always have neck hickeys: because they show up real easy.
The best advice to a good hickey is
1. Don’t hold back on sucki... | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
316 | my boyfriend (26M) and I (24F) have been dating for around 3 months. yesterday, his ex reached out to me and told me that my boyfriend has been liking her instagram stories. she sent me screenshots of him liking recent stories of her, even one in a bikini. she said he also swiped up on one, and they messaged for 4 days... | Have you talked to him about it? For me, I’d be immediately gone. Very disrespectful. | I think she’s trying to break you two up, and start drama. You shouldn’t trust her. Why else would she rat on your bf if she is on good terms with him? Seems like shady behavior. | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
317 | My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now.
Over the past year there have been some worrisome signs of abuse as follows:
* He has used swear words while fighting with me (he was the one to start verbal abuse and over time I also retaliated by swearing back). He has called me a dumb b!tch, c*unt, piece of... | LEAVE NOW!! Please OP realise this is NOT love and he is manipulating you, Call the police and have them help you collect your belongings and escort you out
Don’t become a statistic, You deserve better than this | Please save me from every woman that is actively being abused and still thinking they can fix him.
“Ohhh but the good times are so good”, it’s not signs of abuse, you’re being abused regularly and if you give him warning that you’re leaving your life will be in danger.
I hope you can tell some trusted people and get ... | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
323 | Context: we fought, haven’t spoken to each other in 3 days. She works late night during weekends 7pm - 7am shifts.
I ignored her for few days she got mad. And now she seemed my text and hasn’t texted me in 2 days. She’s trying to get even. I can feel our relationship is heading to toxicity.
We are probably both stu... | It smell bad. What you should do depend of the nature of your fight in the first place. If you yelled at each other for something stupid like the color of the new couch, just be mature and apologize to calm things down. If she insulted your mom out of nowhere, start fishing for a new partner. | This is baby behavior…getting into an argument and then ignoring each others’ texts. Come on. It’s one thing to cool down over night or something, but days? Neither of you should be in a relationship if that’s how both act. Man up and text her you’d like to talk about the other day and have an adult conversation and ... | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
324 | I have noticed on at least two occasions that the contents of my wallet have been fanned out as if they were deliberately taken out and looked at after spending the night at my gfs house. I didn’t notice either time until after I left and got home. We have been dating for about 5 months now and she hasn’t said a word a... | Honestly,it sounds like your partner has boundary issues. I've been with my partner for over 10 years and I've never looked in his wallet without his permission. Perhaps she was financially abused or is trying to catch you in some sorta lie. Honestly red flag but id attempt to talk to her.
5 months is hardly enough t... | My petty side says to write in a small piece of paper "why are you looking through my wallet" and slide it in between your paper money. Then see what she says the next time she looks in your wallet. | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
325 | My bf and I have been dating for 4 months. I'm definitely not planning to have children with him yet. But since he keeps fantasizing about children, a wife and a house every day I decided to find out his "timeline". When I asked him he told me he isn´t even sure about wanting children, just discussing what if´s. He wan... | Wonder why he wants a wife? | > he told me there is someone there to take care of him when he´s old. Idk what to think about this.
Just ask more questions about it. Why was this the first thing coming to his mind? How does he imagine the process of RAISING kids? Will he take time off/reduce to working part-time to be there for them? Will he be wil... | Not Relevant | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
331 | I could really use some perspective here. I'm feeling conflicted about my friendship with K (30M), and I'm not sure if I'm overreacting or if my concerns are justified. We've been friends for five years online, initially bonding over a video game and chatting on Discord. At first, we were close, and he even used to giv... | I'm not sure why you think it's ur place to get involved. Also it's kinda hypocritical to complain about them taking advantage of him when u accepted gifts from him in the past.
You also talked to others about it? So ur gossiping about it? Yea I can see why ppl are upset that ur talking about them to other ppl.
You... | He knows exactly what he’s doing and your own history with him on his vices makes this issue murky for you to get involved in, in my opinion. although I understand how frustrating it must be to watch go down if you care about the guy. People self destruct in all kinds of ways, it sucks you have to watch it go down li... | Hurtful | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
332 | I M18 have a crush on my friend who I will call ,S (F18) for reference we are both in high school but don’t go to the same school I met her about a year ago through a friend and we quickly became friends. I cannot tell if S thinks of me as more than a friend though. A few weeks ago we were at a party and her ride left ... | Always take a chance!!!! Every chance you get an opportunity that is positive for you then take it. You got nothing to lose | Get a pair and make a move. You’re only 18 once. Don’t be 5 years from now looking back on it and wonder what might have happened if you asked out that girl back in high school. Staying friends and “see what happens” is not a good strategy.
Look - the biggest mistake guys make is they often have someone interest... | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
334 | So I feel in a slump. I'm 31 and still have never been married. Most of my 20s I was working and going to school full time to get my 3 degrees.
I feel unlucky in love. My longest relationship ended because he cheated. And I just had a relationship of two months end because he said he's too busy for a girlfriend.
I ... | i don't know where you are from, but I think 31 is just a normal age to not be married yet. Hell, I even know people that got married in their 50's. You should just do what you like, and focus on yourself. When you do that, you might even gain some confidence in yourself. People like people who like themselves. Because... | Hey you’re not alone. I got cheated on by my long term bf too and im so glad i didnt marry the wrong person. I get your frustration but dont change to get more dates. Be authentically you and eventually you’ll meet someone that clicks. Are you smart enough? Girl you have 3 degrees! That’s so impressive!!! If you truly ... | Emotional Support | Emotional Support | Comment 2 | part 3 |
337 | So basically I went through a break up, it was my first relationship stayed together for 2 years. She went abroad to study and started lying to me about her whereabouts the second she landed, was very disrespectful throughout the relationship, shit load of issues. Not nice to me at all but nice to everyone else like wt... | No, they're never going to be the person you fantasize they are. | Why do you want to get back together? It seems like she treated you bad and didn’t have respect for you. It seems like you idealize the fun times you had together and miss that. Unless she realizes that it was very bad what she did, and you trust that she can change.. i don’t see a reason to get back together. It’s als... | Commentator's opinion | Emotional Support | Comment 2 | part 3 |
341 | My boyfriend has always been a little chunky but reasonably fit, exercising 2-4 times a week depending on his schedule. We're not taking six pack fit, but just a mild 'dad bod'. It's never been a problem for me.
Recently, he's started turning his fitness journey up to eleven. He goes 48-72 hours without food and still... | He doesn’t eat for 2-3 days??? Yes. That sounds like an ED to me. | As a former wrestler and competitive martial artist during most of my school years. I saw this a lot and was warned by the coaches and the trainers not to do this.
Yeah, this is not good. He needs to eat more consistently and healthy and not starve his body…especially during training. Such crash dieting can lead to he... | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
342 | I broke up with my boyfriend last Monday.
Long story short, he really betrayed my trust and disrespected me.
Now it's been a week, he's saying that if we are a strong couple (like he thought we were) we should be able to move past this.
I feel as though I've been pretty strong for the past three years, moving past hi... | Don't call him and ask him to come to you. No matter how bad you feel, do not call him under any circumstances. | You can’t stay with him and also honor yourself. Pick one. | Practical Advice | Hurtful | Comment 1 | part 3 |
343 | I'm 21 year old male long story short went round friends uni party met this girl around 2am she seemed interested in me started playing with my hair, tiggling me. 5am we left she went back to her flat I went downstairs to sleep, I then messaged her saying there's not space here to sleep can I stay round yours she said ... | If she hasn't responded in five days then she's not that interested in you. Maybe she was surprised that you didn't make any moves on her and maybe she thinks that you're boring? But you did what you felt was right at the time and if she was truly interested and liked you, believe you me she would let you know or at le... | So all these words typed to random strangers. You could have already texted her again, and let her know you like her, you were too nervous to make a move, there was also alcohol involved, and you want to see her as your better self | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
345 | Navigating a long-distance relationship for eight months, the relationship was lovely and straightforward. Both parties were happy and seriously committed. However, things soon turned darker as my trust issues were triggered by her outgoing vibes. She has an Instagram account with around 800 followers; she's popular, w... | If she wants you out of her life, leave. Now.
It's not up to you to impose your will upon her or force her to be your girlfriend.
Repeated false accusations of cheating are a form of verbal abuse. Constantly trying to control her behavior and who she's allowed to speak to is a form of abuse.
It doesn't matter who... | Insight: If you refuse to accept that she has broken up with you that means that you are not just selfish, you are a monster. Your behavior is completely unacceptable. | Practical Advice | Hurtful | Comment 1 | part 3 |
346 | in my desire to get him to initiate sex, i’ve given him plenty of opportunities but he either doesn’t take them or he just waits for me to do it.
last night we were in bed, and he legit just laid his head on my breast, cuddling me and that was it. when i asked him later if he had been trying he said yes, badly.
we ha... | It sounds like he just doesn't feel comfortable being overt and forceful and he never was if this has come about due to frustration over you always initiating. Not all men enjoy being the aggressor type and it feels like you're trying to force him into a role he doesn't feel comfortable with.
You say you've told him w... | My last boyfriend made me feel the same. The way he approached me for sex was different than anyone I’d been with before. Normally I can tell when a man wants to have sex, but not him. I talked to him, and I think he tried to change. But it still was unlike anything I’ve experienced. Broke up tonight | Emotional Support | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
350 | My boyfriend and I have been in a very committed relationship for 6 months. He is now backpacking Europe for two months. He invited me to join him for few weeks but I wasn’t able to travel for visa reasons. And tomorrow is our 6th month anniversary and he told me he is going sightseeing with a girl he met at one of the... | this is kind of how traveling solo works. you link up with random people and go on adventures. ive met tons of people of both sexes that were just friends and made traveling alone easier when you know someone. i wouldnt worry too much about it
i dont know if people actually celebrate 6 month anniversaries or not (i do... | I understand your concerns. But either you trust him or you suffer from your jalousy. The latter doesn't help at all in this situation. Worse, it might turn your boyfriend off. He just wants to have a good trip and if this girl goes with him to this place, why not. You don't fall in love with every person you meet.
T... | Commentator's opinion | Emotional Support | Comment 2 | part 3 |
351 | My partner and I have been together for almost 4 years. We started dating in grade 10 and we are currently 2 years out of high school. We have lived together for the last 2 years of our relationship (he moved in with me).
Every time I ask him to do something he either forgets or doesn’t do it properly. For example, t... | You leave. As long as you stay with him, he will not do better. Why would he? He has someone at home to do all of it for him or remind him to do it. He doesn't have to grow up. | Why are you still with him? | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
354 | Im very very happy with my life and love being single. I do date occasionally but I would like to have a prolonged period of time where I don’t even entertain the possibility of a relationship.
But the loneliness usually takes over and I feel the need to at least text or talk to a guy, and feel like I’m making progre... | Some people are naturally better at being alone. But you're not really even talking about that. Do you not have any friends, or family to connect with? Why do you need a man to talk too? Are you looking for quick validation? Focus on friendships.
Personally I like being alone. Or I at least need alot of it. The secr... | For me, their company has to be better than my solitude. Plus, I’ve done a lot of work to become emotionally healthy and I don’t feel the need to find someone that can jeopardize that | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
360 | i don’t have anyone else to go to, please be kind as i’m hurting a lot.
FYI he’s a very straightforward, blunt, and honest man. please don’t tell me he’s playing me, cheating, or there’s another girl. it’s not like that all, and i’m very sure he’s in love with me and cares about me. it’s just that he’s had very very ... | Probably wants to hook up with someone else and is using this excuse as the opportunity. That way if you find out, you both were on a break. It really doesn’t ever make sense to take a break from each other while still remaining faithful. It would make more sense for him to just ask for some space without actually taki... | Can you tell us anything about what exactly happened in the moment that triggered him?
I’d also move on. Something doesn’t add up. | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
362 | So we have been dating a little over 6 months and because of our jobs we don’t see each other very often. She has mainly guy friends and we have been getting in arguments over her wanting to go and stay in Airbnbs with 3 other guys over the weekend. I am uncomfortable with this even though I fully trust her but one of ... | A girl wanting to go stay in an Airbnb with 3 other men (you do not mention other girls) in which everyone knows that one of the men liked her and the other "borderline" sexually harassed her to the point that her employer is aware . . . makes literally no sense at all. There is nothing about this scenario that makes ... | I don't think you're being controlling | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
363 | So I (21F) have been in a relationship for a couple of months but it was not it for me, I felt nothing, just hurt by his (21M) actions (or lack of them) and I communicated it to him and he said he won't change so I broke up with him. Now I'm trying to date, but the thing is that I literally feel nothing. I want to feel... | I used to feel the same way. Like I just kept meeting girls who I thought were attractive, but they didn’t meet any normal standards. And I thought it was just me that was the problem. But then I met my current girlfriend, and I’m telling you that you can be in a good relationship, you just never have to stop searching... | Alpha widowed & can’t pair bond. Most common problem these days. That’s what happens when women confuse sexual attention with desire to commit. | Emotional Support | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
364 | So my girlfriend and I have been dating for about 9 months and I'm not sure how to tell her I get frustrated at some of the questions she asks me because my emotions are not complex enough to handle them. For example: Sometimes she will ask me how I am feeling or what I am thinking about. I didn't have a problem answer... | What | Does she think you were worried or upset earlier because you had a stomach ache? Some peoples emotions show up physically.
Do you want to get more in touch with your emotions? Ask her if her stomach hurts when she is upset. Or idk, have this conversation you posted with her. | Not Relevant | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
372 | Idk if it’s just me but I’m 20 and every now and then I get a match in the app but literally 9/10 times there’s no response or anything like they just swipe the profile or sum but past that, do women see men with tinder or other dating apps as a red flag for using/having? | Seems pretty normal to have a low success rate on dating apps as a guy. Very few people unless they are breathtakingly attractive get anything out of it so it’s nothing to be alarmed at. I think even off apps it can be challenging although there is more opportunities to bond with people. But I’ve struggled yeah. | Most women men are looking for on there are bots or scams.
People who no longer use the app would probably say it's a red flag.
Men have said they swipe right on all since the odds of actually meeting someone is low.
Women have more vetting to do.
A lot still use the app but some (including me) don't and think it'... | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
374 | Had a guy slide into my dm yesterday. He's been filling me for a while and loves what I post and says he wants to be friends. After an hour of dm I fall asleep and he tells me to text him in the morning and sends his number.
Super nice, sweet and attentive asks me lots of questions and such. And I haven't seen a red ... | Just see how it goes. Keep talking to him and eventually you'll get a better sense of what's going on. | Get his number and call a few times. Beats the hell out of phone tag with texts | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
379 | I've been dating this girl for 3 months now. She's always been my all time crush/type. We have different lifestyles; she enjoys parting and drinking which I don't. She’s passionate about everything. Last week, her period came 11 days early, which is unusual for her. I suspect she might have taken Plan B (the morning-af... | Wow, you are a man baby. Even the most regular of periods can have the odd week off. Which doesn’t matter because why the fuck are you tracking her cycle (???) to see if she’s cheating on you (??????). This is a whole other level of insecurity.
Also, have you heard of scam calls? I personally get them like 3 times a d... | Please leave her the hell alone. You are almost 30 years old and acting far younger than she is | Hurtful | Hurtful | Comment 1 | part 3 |
381 | Went on a really random tinder date while out of town. Completely last minute, but actually had a great time! Went to her house, did a puzzle together, talked about some deep topics, actually had a lot in common. Super cute and sweet girl. Ended with cuddling and making out while watching a movie together. Didn't sleep... | 36 F and I think it’s super thoughtful! That would only be creepy if you didn’t have a date, btw. | Being a nice person is never creepy, sir | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
385 | my bf and I are long distance for the time being as we go to the same area around college, but we are currently 13 hours apart timezone-wise. i really enjoy spending time together as we share the same academic interests and hobbies, we called everyday for 1-3 hours (barring things like seeing family or doing other acti... | You need to understand boundaries and how to self soothe. Your whole post is about you. You want, you feel, you enjoy, you prefer.
What. About. Him?
I have a friend I'm really close to. I LOVE spending time with him, he's one of my favorite people. We get along like a house on fire, laugh our asses off, we can te... | That’s too much for a majority of men imo. Cut it down to a 2-3 times a week and see how it goes. You can convince him to keep doing it but his feelings won’t change and could become something that pushes him away.
If breaking the routine impacts you that much it’s on you to solve it, not your BF becoming a crunch. | Commentator's opinion | Practical Advice | Comment 2 | part 3 |
387 | Im not okay.
Fr i have been trying to focus on myself and control my thoughts but i cant not think of death. | Please call 988 suicide and crisis lifeline | Have you tried some medicinal Marijuana, jokes aside no matter how much off a good reason people give you, you just won't be able to see it if you keep your self surrounded by walls of shit, you've gonna need to get your hands dirty to break the walls and listen to reason. Or maybe just try some mushrooms. | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | part 3 |
389 |
My girlfriend and I were in a 6 years relationship, almost 7, for educational reasons some of these were ldr and we discussed this before me moving abroad.
Well last year I decided to move back to my home country to move in together with her. A few days after arriving I was looking through her phone's gallery, obliga... | Yep. Right choice. You don’t want to be with anyone long term who folds so easily when adversity or inconvenience shows up. You need someone who can endure because everything is not going to always be rainbows and sunshine. | It sounds like you made a good decision, yeah.
Much love bro | Emotional Support | Emotional Support | Comment 1 | part 3 |
391 | Hi, I’m a 27 year old male. I recently went on a date with a girl (25). Long story short we went on a date and we got along pretty well, at least in my opinion. We had a lot in common and had a lot of the same views. By the end of the date she says, “I’d really like to see you again” I reply with “I’d really like to se... | Option A: Wait 3 more days and then ask her on a second date with plans already in mind. Don't mention Instagram or the delay in her response. Dinner, where, and when. The tone of your text will be fun, excited for whatever place you want to go with her, and happy when she accepts your date invitation.
Option B: Take ... | Woman here, you are not necesseraly being ghosted. Not replying after ONLY 2 days is in my opinion normal. Nowadays there is so much pressure from everyone to reply fast. You have to imagine, the work e-mails/phone call her familly friends, posting on Instagram... of course you come only after all that! She just met yo... | Practical Advice | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
397 | I have very low self esteem due to my upbringing. I have tried therapy multiple times but can’t seem to overcome it.
This has taken a massive toll on my dating life, as I believe that I would be doing someone a disservice by having them date someone like me, when many other (and “better”) options are available to th... | Low self esteem, what exactly do YOU feel contributes to your low self esteem? Your appearance? Abilities? 🧐 | Yes. But I also suffer from imposter syndrome at work etc. I think the two are connected somehow. | Not Relevant | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | part 3 |
399 | Hi all, I'm the type of person who likes to help as much as I can with suggestions and ideas on how to make their situation easier and my bf of 9 months has an online course he's taking but he's behind because of his time management. I've noticed every time I try to help and make it easier for him to find time he will ... | I'm not sure there's anything u can do. It's his class it doesn't sound like he needs any help. | Your desire to help is genuine and heart-felt, but it's fair to say that your boyfriend has a large amount of pride and ego around his time-management woes.
It also seems that he does not appreciate the help you are trying to offer. This may be because he does not have faith in your ability to help, or your helping wi... | Commentator's opinion | Emotional Support | Comment 2 | part 3 |
400 | This is a rant post.
So basically I (24F) talked to this cute guy (29M) everyday,everytime for 3 weeks and we had 2 dates that went really good, we kissed,hugged...
Then he suddenly became distant during 2 days. He didnt reply at my text for 24 hours despite being online during the day so I texted him "is everythi... | We are in a time of immaturity. Age mean nothing anymore since you have 50yo men wasting their time in online gaming. He just left because you didn't had sex yet and that's all he was interested in (since you didn't mentioned sex). Or he was just dating multiple women and choosed another one. You dodged a bullet actual... | He might have avoidant attachment. I do have to say it’s better this happen now than months later when you are more attached | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 1 | part 3 |
82 | I’m a 33F Asian ‘happily’ married to a 33M Asian. We have been dating for about 7 years prior to marriage.
My husband has been really amazing. He really loves me (kisses me, hugs me, tells me he loves me very frequently, irons my clothes, does laundry, cleans the house). He is also good looking. I mean he is literally... | He's either gay, asexual, not attracted to you, or has some serious trauma he has not addressed.
At this point you just need to sit down with him and say explicitly, "I am not happy in a sexless relationship. We need to talk about why you don't want to have sex with me and if that is ever going to change." I know it's... | Tell him if things don't change, you gotta go. You can either choose to continue to be shy about this (which is not working), or start having the hard conversation. | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | evaluation |
85 | So, I’ve(M18) recently come to terms with the fact that despite my best attempts, i’m definitely a nerd, and i enjoy being a nerd.
With that realization has come the epiphany that i really like nerdy girls, too. My question is this: Where do I find nerdy girls?? There’s no dating app (no stealing my idea 😡), and the... | I am sorry, I don't have enough experience to help you out here, I used to be very social, but this anti-social culture has taken its toll.
I just want to tell you, great job on being yourself, never change. I hope everything works out for you! that last idea you have doesn't seem that bad tbh, women love Gojo lma... | Nerdy girls are easy to find actually, the problem is having them like you | Emotional Support | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | evaluation |
88 | I'm 25 old guy staying in Hyderabad. I have been using bumble and tinder since 1 year. Still no use. Give your suggestions?? If anyone interested for hookups, Please DM | Being physically attractive, having low standards, and having a good tinder profile that shows you’re physically attractive are the bare minimum to get matches with an emphasis on hookups | I don’t advocate for the hookup lifestyle. But you need to do an *honest* self assessment and see where you need to improve your profile. | Practical Advice | Practical Advice | Comment 1 | evaluation |
89 | I have a friend who said hes coming to visit my area and asked to meet up twice as i said the first time i would think about it, i said yes and he asked me if i would like to watch all the Harry Potter movies together then asked if ild like to watch all of them with him.
I dont think he sees me as more then a friend s... | honestly just sounds like he wants to netflix and chill with you
in the majority of cases when you think a guy see's you just as a friend he's just being scummy and acting that way so he can find an in with you
not so weird asking if you want to watch 1 movie you both enjoy together.. 8 is a bit much that's like a ... | I think it’s a great way to become more than friends. But let things happen naturally. | Commentator's opinion | Commentator's opinion | Comment 2 | evaluation |
End of preview. Expand in Data Studio
💟 Relationship Advice dataset card
Dataset Description
Dataset Summary
The Relationship Advice dataset is an English-language compilation of posts and their respective comments concerning dating and human romantic relationships. The primary objective of this dataset is to aid LLMs in categorizing responses and providing appropriate answers based on the emotional needs expressed by the writer. The data was gathered from two subreddits: r/dating_advice and r/relationship_advice.
Supported Tasks and Leaderboards
text-classification: This dataset can be used to train a text classification model. The model should categorize the comments into one of 6 labels, considering the post as the broader context.Natural Language Inference: Given a post and its two comments, the model needs to decide which comment is more helpful to the post writer. Thus, the model must infer the subtle semantics of both comments and their related post.
Languages
The text in the dataset is in English
Dataset Structure
Data Instances
Each data point consists of a post, two comments, two labels, one for each comment (first task), and a third label indicating which comment is more helpful to the post writer (second task).
Data Fields
example_id: Index of the example, ranged between 1 and 400post: The post textcomment_1: The first comment of the postcomment_2: The second comment of the postcomment_1_label: The label of the first comment.comment_2_label: The label of the second comment.batch: The annotation batch this datapoint belong to. One of "exploration", "evaluation" and "part 3"
Data Splits
The data is split into a training, validation and test set. The samples are picked at random according to the following scheme:
The test set (150) consists of samples only from the "part 3" batch since these are the samples that were annotated by the external annotators, thus giving it the highest quality.
The validation set (40) consists of samples only from the "evaluation" batch, which is the second highest quality batch.
The training set (210), consists of all the rest.
| Train | Dev | Test | |
|---|---|---|---|
| exploration | 80 | 0 | 0 |
| evaluation | 40 | 40 | 0 |
| part 3 | 90 | 0 | 150 |
Dataset Creation
Significance and Advantages of Utilization
The Relationship Advice dataset was created to serve as a testing ground for machines to learn how to respond with greater sensitivity to users' emotional needs. To do so, the machines must be able to identify the type of response they are providing and, if multiple options are available, determine which one would be most appropriate and beneficial for the writer. Reddit provided the foundation for this dataset, as the language used in conversations on the platform is everyday language, and the topics involve a wide range of emotions, requiring a deep understanding of semantics and meanings conveyed in the text. Training machines with this data would help them improve their emotional intelligence and respond accordingly.
Source Data
Initial Data Collection and Normalization
The data from both subreddits was gathered using the Reddit API. The posts were filtered to have a maximum of 500 characters and at least two comments, with each comment being less than 500 characters. After the filtering process, 400 randomly sampled posts (along with their comments) were drawn from both subreddits.
Who are the source language producers?
The language producers are users of the r/dating_advice and r/relationship_advice subreddits between 2022 and 2024. No further demographic information was available from the data source.
Annotations
There were two annotation tasks
Task 1: Comment classification to one of the following labels
- Practical Advice
- Emotional support
- Commentators' opinion
- Hurtful
- Sarcasm
- Not Relevant
Task 2: Given a post and it's two comments, which comment is more helpful to the post writer. The labels are:
- Comment 1
- Comment 2
Annotation process
There were to groups that annotated this data - The owners and external annotators. The data was split to 3 batches: Exploration (80 items), Evaluation(80 items) and part 3 (240 items).
- Exploration batch: After defining the task, the authors began annotating the first 80 samples to identify data patterns and develop annotation guidelines based on their findings.
- Evaluation batch: Following the drafting of the guidelines, two of the authors proceeded to annotate this batch by the provided annotation guidelines.
- Part 3 batch: This batch was assigned to external annotators. The first 30 records were given to the annotators for annotation in order to enhance the clarity of the guidelines. After the necessary improvements, the final version of the guidelines was provided to the annotators, and they completed the labeling process.
Who are the annotators?
The owners of the dataset comprise two males and one female, while the external annotators, who contributed an alternative perspective to the annotation process, include one male and three females. All annotators are aged between 22 and 27 and are final-semester students at the Data Science and Decisions faculty at Technion.
Personal and Sensitive Information
The posts and comments do not contain any personal information and are submitted anonymously. No identifiers regarding the authors were obtained.
Considerations for Using the Data
Social Impact of Dataset
The Relationship Advice dataset has the potential to significantly impact how language models interact with users, especially in emotionally charged situations. By training models on this dataset, we can develop AI systems capable of providing sensitive, empathetic, and contextually appropriate responses in scenarios related to human relationships. This could enhance AI's ability to support individuals seeking advice or emotional support online, potentially alleviating feelings of isolation or distress. However, it's crucial to consider the implications of deploying such models. While the AI can assist users, there is a risk of it reinforcing harmful stereotypes or providing advice that might not be suitable for all users. Therefore, continuous monitoring, improvement, and ethical considerations must accompany the development and deployment of models trained on this dataset to ensure they contribute positively to users' well-being.
Discussion of Biases
Bias is an inherent risk in any dataset derived from human-generated content, especially from platforms like Reddit, where the user base may not be representative of the broader population. The Relationship Advice dataset could contain biases related to gender, cultural norms, socio-economic status, or other demographic factors that are not explicitly captured in the data but may influence the nature of the advice and comments. Moreover, the subreddit communities from which the data is drawn may have their own subcultural biases, which can be reflected in the data. For example, advice given might skew toward certain perspectives that are more prevalent in these online communities, potentially marginalizing other viewpoints. Additionally, the annotation process, despite efforts to standardize it through guidelines, might also introduce biases based on the annotators' interpretations and backgrounds. To mitigate these biases, users of the dataset should consider employing techniques such as bias detection and mitigation during model training and evaluation. It is also recommended that models trained on this dataset be tested across diverse user groups to ensure fairness and inclusivity in the responses generated.
Other Known Limitations
While the Relationship Advice dataset provides a valuable resource for training models to understand and generate emotionally appropriate responses, it has several limitations:
Limited Scope of Advice: The dataset is derived from a specific subset of Reddit users who engage with particular topics. As a result, the advice and perspectives captured may not generalize to broader contexts or different cultures.
Post Length and Comment Limitation: Posts and comments are truncated at 500 characters, which may omit important context or nuance that could be crucial for understanding the full scope of the conversation. This limitation could affect the model’s ability to fully comprehend and appropriately respond to more complex or detailed scenarios.
Lack of Demographic Information: The dataset does not include detailed demographic information about the users who generated the posts and comments. This lack of metadata makes it challenging to analyze how responses may vary across different demographic groups, and limits the ability to account for or correct potential biases related to user backgrounds.
Annotation Subjectivity: Despite the use of guidelines, the annotation process is inherently subjective. Different annotators may interpret the same post or comment differently, leading to inconsistencies in the labels. This subjectivity could influence the performance of models trained on the dataset, especially in tasks requiring nuanced understanding of emotional content.
Potential for Misuse: As with any dataset involving sensitive topics, there is a risk of misuse. Models trained on this data should not be deployed in critical settings without thorough evaluation and safeguards to prevent harm. For instance, using such models in mental health support contexts without proper oversight could lead to inappropriate or harmful advice being given to users.
Additional Information
Dataset Creators
The dataset was created by Yonatan Koifman, Yael Hari, and Yahav Cohen as part of a project for the NLP Research course at the Data Science & Decisions Faculty at the Technion.
Contributions
Special thanks to Or Cohen, Or Dado, Kere Gruetke, and Tal Shalom for being the external annotators of our dataset.
- Downloads last month
- 40