url stringlengths 62 129 | title stringlengths 25 96 | speaker stringlengths 3 20 | full_text stringlengths 3.34k 126k | clean_text stringlengths 21 124k ⌀ |
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https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/jim-gaffigan-quality-time-transcript/ | Jim Gaffigan: Quality Time (2019) – Full Transcript | jim gaffigan | (audience cheering, applauding) Thank you! Thank you! Oh my God. Thank you. Thank you for coming out. (audience cheering) It’s good to be here. This is what I look like. It’s mostly my fault. Well, it’s all my fault. I wish I had an excuse, you know? Like I had to gain all this weight for a movie. There’s no movie. If ... | (audience cheering, applauding) Thank you! Thank you! Oh my God. Thank you. Thank you for coming out. (audience cheering) It’s good to be here. This is what I look like. It’s mostly my fault. Well, it’s all my fault. I wish I had an excuse, you know? Like I had to gain all this weight for a movie. There’s no movie. If ... |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/ramy-youssef-feelings-transcript/ | Ramy Youssef: Feelings (2019) | Transcript | ramy youssef | "Welcome to the meeting. Are you Mohammed? No, ’cause this dude texted me, and he was like, “Yo,(...TRUNCATED) | "I’ve been thinking a lot about how we know what we know and how that affects the way we treat eac(...TRUNCATED) |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/taylor-tomlinson-quarter-life-crisis-transcript/ | Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis (2020) | Transcript | taylor tomlinson | "[“Making Love to the Dead” by Beginners plays] ♪ Darling, go ♪ ♪ Hey ♪\n♪ Watch your (...TRUNCATED) | "[cheering] Wow! I hope my ex sees this. Thank you. Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much for coming. This (...TRUNCATED) |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/ari-shaffir-double-negative-transcript/ | ARI SHAFFIR: DOUBLE NEGATIVE (2017) – Full Transcript | ari shaffir | "Shaffir’s Double Negative collection includes a 44-minute set called Children, followed by a 47-m(...TRUNCATED) | "[audience cheering] Thank you, everybody. [chuckles] Thank you very much. Hell yeah. My friend got (...TRUNCATED) |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/nate-bargatze-greatest-average-american-transcript/ | Nate Bargatze: The Greatest Average American (2021) | Transcript | nate bargatze | "[folk rock music playing] ♪ Family ♪\n♪ Singin’ in the kitchen ♪\n♪ Family ♪\n♪ (...TRUNCATED) | "[audience cheers and applauds] [folk rock continues playing] [audience members cheer] All right. Th(...TRUNCATED) |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/aziz-ansari-buried-alive-2013-full-transcript/ | AZIZ ANSARI: BURIED ALIVE (2013) – Full Transcript | aziz ansari | "Ladies and gentlemen… Aziz Ansari! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much. Philadelph(...TRUNCATED) | "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much. Philadelphia, wow! Thank you. Thank you so much(...TRUNCATED) |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/bill-maher-live-from-d-c-2014-full-transcript/ | BILL MAHER: LIVE FROM D.C. (2014) – Full Transcript | bill maher | "Broadcast live on September 12, 2014 from the Warner Theater in Washington, D.C. * WOMAN: At the to(...TRUNCATED) | "[Applause] And hello again, everyone. I’m Keith Olbermann, Reporting live from up here in the bal(...TRUNCATED) |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/dylan-moran-off-the-hook-2015-full-transcript/ | Dylan Moran: Off The Hook (2015) – Transcript | dylan moran | "Ladies and gentlemen, will you please welcome to the stage Mr Dylan Moran. [CROWD CLAPPING] [CROWD (...TRUNCATED) | "[CROWD CLAPPING] [CROWD CHEERING] Hey! Hello! Thank you! Hello, thank you very much for coming out,(...TRUNCATED) |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/tig-notaro-boyish-girl-interrupted-transcript/ | Tig Notaro: Boyish Girl Interrupted (2015) – Transcript | tig notaro | "(Chattering) (music playing) (audience cheering) Thank you. Oh, my gosh. Are you kidding me? My goo(...TRUNCATED) | "(Chattering) (music playing) (audience cheering) Thank you. Oh, my gosh. Are you kidding me? My goo(...TRUNCATED) |
https://scrapsfromtheloft.com/comedy/vir-das-outside-in-the-lockdown-special-transcript/ | Vir Das: Outside in – The Lockdown Special (2020) – Transcript | vir das | "[soft piano music playing] [Vir Das] What you’re about to watch wasn’t supposed to happen. It(...TRUNCATED) | "All right. What’s up! What’s up, everyone? Hello! Good evening, and welcome to what promises to(...TRUNCATED) |
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